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News from 200812/30/08 Okay e-friends, just enough time to say thanks for listening in 2008…we had such a fine time (I am so grateful for all our wacky and fun jazz hangs!)…thanks! Now we’re gassing up the jet for a trip to D.C. to request a meager bail out for some poor judgment losses earlier this year when I threw $29 (good money after bad) at a lotto power ball investment which needless to say was a total loss…oh well…my friends in high places say that I’m a shoe in for a bit ‘o the ole bail out bucks and since these funds are doled out, rounded up to the nearest billion…well I’ll have a few extra buck to spread around. Any suggestions??? • Wednesday 12/31 New Year’s Eve at Jay’s Bistro 6-8:30 solo piano, Mark Sloniker/piano Then 9-1 Colleen Crosson/voice, Erik Applegate/bass, Shilo Stroman/drums and Mark (Bailed Out) Sloniker/piano. 12/17/08 Authorities continue to give Iraqi shoe thrower a severe tongue lashing and while the assailant admitted he behaved like a real heel, after a bit of soul searching, he still continues to consider Bush his arch enemy. His heel like behavior spiked after being pumped up on athletes foot powder but soon afterward he seemed to be a common loafer and fell in step with a defeatist attitude. “These weapons of “last” (that’s a pun, honest…look it up) destruction have sure got me in a jam” he was quoted as saying while security guards made him toe the line. Another reporter said, “The offense was carried out on a shoestring budget, as penny loafers were used in this cents-less act…where the perpetrator said he was just trying to get his two cents in!” Prosecutors intend to sock it to him (despite holes in their case, darn it) while the defense says he’s a shoe in for a 12 step rehabilitation program (if they can only jog his memory about his getting the boot at his job earlier that day). President Bush was quoted as saying, “After I saw the first one fly by, well I was just waiting for the other shoe to…you know…” In response to this situation we will be playing the music of Schubert, Schumann and Schroeder, exclusively this week (if the shoe fits)…try us on for size! • Wednesday 12/17 Jay’s features Derf Green on hand drums and foot tapping, Roger Barnhart on walking bass, Mark Sloniker on twinkle-toe-tinkling- piano with special guest guitarist, Mike (Laced up to fly) Davis (7-10). We’ll be transposing everything two steps up all week end, so wear heels! Thanks For Listening! Mark (aka Santa’s Elvis) 12/10/08 Here are 12 of the grainiest groaners I've gregariously groaned at...grateful to my friend N.D. for aiding and abetting this season with sanctimonious silliness. Thanks N.D.! Jazz follows! 1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi. • Wednesday 12/10 Jay's Bistro 7-10 jazz starts with monster trux jazz trio (this incarnation [that's a country of drive-by folks] includes Shilo Stroman/drums, Erik Applegate/bass and Mark Sloniker in third person and on piano. At 8pm saxophonist, Andrew Vogt joins in. Mark 12/05/08 In my weekly gig announcement I forgot to let you know about a wonderful concert this Sunday night (7pm) at Avo’s here in Fort Collins. Johnsmith, a fabulous singer-songwriter/guitarist and long time friend of ours will be in concert, and Colleen (Crosson) and I will perform with him. We’re kind of the back up band: Colleen brings her sweet and fine harmonies to John’s tunes, I layer in some keys, and it’s really one of my favorite nights of the year. John’s songs are beautiful stories put to music and his Irish-esque tenor/baritone voice becomes the consummate story teller. We did it last year to a very packed house at Avogadro’s Number and it did a number on all of us present (I think the number was 1). I even debuted my song The Low Tech Blues and my Janice-Joplinesque-Tom-Waittsian voice quite a hoot to boot! Tickets are $17 and are available at Avo’s (605 S. Mason St.), The Finest Cds in Campus West, or Catalyst Coffee (just north of Horsetooth Rd. on Shields). You can sample some of John’s music at http://www.johnsmithmusic.com as always… Thanks for listening, Mark M 12/04/08 Two fine quotes, the first from Winston Chuchill who had high regard for the insightfulness of pigs when he said…” Cats look down on all people while dogs tend to worship people but pigs look on people as equals (and acurately so…I might add)” which brings to mind the second quote by the famous Harvard mathimatician turned satirical singer/song writer Tom Leher…who put it rather succinctly when he said “ self indulgence is better than no indulgence at all”…in this time of Thanksgiving I am truly thankful of your indulgence of my waky weekly wordy wanderings. Thanks! At this point I am to believe that I have EITHER become a rather good speller of words OR that my “spell-check” device has died from over use (abuse) or some other mal function. So at this point I have no choice but to advertently (that’s the opposite of inadvertinently) misspell words in order to ass her tain whether or not spell check met her her untimely demise OR I are the absoloot spelling rooler and in cape a bull of making an air-or………………….WOW, spell check…is dead…spell bound, it’s toste, toe tully burnt…I’ve kilt it! I guess we know that our society is in real trouble when even your spell-check bounces! The only thing left to do is play music…preferably jazz (which seems to render spell-chaeck inconsonant)! Here’s where… • Thursday 12/4 Jay’s Bistro 7-10:30 my bass friend Roger Barnhart and I (mark sloniker) hold down the Fort while guests join us for creative cameo camraderie…boy this absence of spell check cuts both weighs…will the letter of the law out-way the spirit of the law? Thanks for letting me in to your e-world…these are some great gigs, please come down for some great music! Mark 11/19/08 Perhaps you too have seen adds on the Comedy Channel for a video called “Girls Gone Wild” in which college age gals in a “spring break” like atmosphere are exposing their breasts to the camera for reasons that seem unclear (maybe the reasons were clearer when I was younger) At any rate if you happen to see the NEW video entitled “Piano Players Gone Wild” in which middle aged pianists are mooning the camera for what appears to be no reason and one of them looks like me…it’s NOT…it happens to be my twin brother (evil twin brother that is) Skippy, who appears to be trying to impress the girls gone wild girls with his lunar luminosity (not such a bright idea). Pay no mind to that full moon (I take a dim view of it personally)! Also “Piano Players Gone Wild” lacks plot development, any strong story line and is poorly lit. Oh well…in other jazz news: Happy full moon to all! Mark 11/12/08 I feel so vindicated! Pumping gas at nearly half the price of last summers “gastritis” outbreak: At this price, if I drive 300% more than I did when gas was expensive I figure I can make back what I lost in July by Christmas…and then some!?$^#*%^! Honk if you love geese!!! A recent report in “The Jazz Economist” revealed that jazz derives three times as many notes per song as does country & western, folk rock or heavy metal music combined. Jazz listeners derived 40% more satisfaction per jazz set than 80% of other music style consumers. And Jazz listeners derived 78% more pleasure and hence enjoy 49% lighter hearts by listening to that wacky, knucklehead sweet, sincere (none- more-American) music, jazz! Lighter hearts derive more Miles Per Gallon…less weight, ya see…So, derive on down to your nearest authorized jazz emporium for the music that’s good for your heart, your head, your car and your country! Why here’s such a jazz emporium now! • Wednesday 11/12 (7-10pm) Jay’s (Jazz Emporium) and Bistro: Dr. Forest (No, he really IS a Dr.) Greenough/bass, Kevin Whalen/trumpet, Mark(s) Raynes and Sloniker on oil drums and gas powered piano (it has three gas pedals and is tuned to jam)…great heart enlightening jazz for all makes and models! Shifting gears to next week: Mike Davis/guitar, Wednesday 11/19. Kevin Karrick/guitar, Thursday 11/20. Peter Sommer/sax, Friday 11/21. Mary Buirgy/voice, Saturday 11/22. The first 99 heavy hearts will receive a free valve job to get you back into circulation with a lighter heart AND more MPGs with Jazz! Tanks for Listening! Mark 11/6/08 “Free at Last! Free at Last!” (With all due respect to Dr. Martin Luther King) I celebrate being free at last, from this l--o--n--g campaign season replete with endless ads of nastiness and squalor! Thank God Almighty, we’re free at last! We will celebrate by grinding “attack ads” into “tactful adulations” and turning lawn signs into “longing for unity”…we will be playing a new kind of blues called the red-white-and-blues (it sounds a little like Yankee Doodle Dandy with a back beat). Here’s where to find us: NEXT WEEK enjoy: Kevin Whalen/trumpet, Wednesday 11/12. Gene Libbea/bass, Thursday 11/13. Colleen Crosson/voice, Saturday 11/15. Upcoming in November: Erik Applegate/bass, 11/19. Kevin Karrick/guitar, 11/20. Peter Sommer/sax, 11/21. Mary Buirgy/voice, 11/22. Get down here and catch some “Politically Free” jazz while you can…the 2012 Election Season starts in three weeks! Yikes! We shall overcome someday…. Thanks for Listening! Mark 10/29/08 “This” just in from Wall Street: Today's stock market report: Helium was up, feathers were down. Paper was stationary. Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading. Knives were up sharply. Cows steered into a bull market. Pencils lost a few points. Hiking equipment was trailing. Elevators rose, while escalators continued their slow decline. Weights were up in heavy trading. Light switches were off. Mining equipment hit rock bottom. Diapers remain unchanged. Shipping lines stayed at an even keel. The market for raisins dried up. Coca Cola fizzled. (Rocky Mountain News) I can take stock in a report like that. It certainly rejuvenates my trust in the system! The rising interest in Jazz appears to b a major player in low volume trading of “fours” and “eights” (if you’re not a jazz musician you may not get that one)….but if you come down to Jay’s for jazz, you will get this: Erik Applegate is back with us on Wednesday 11/5 and Friday 11/7. Colleen Crosson is with us Saturday 11/15. Thanks for listening! Mark 10/22/08 Dear E-Friends (please take stock in this)… Normally I avoid discussing any advice regarding buying or selling of stocks, but I felt this is important enough to share and warn you, since this explosive situation might prove to be yet another ENRON. Please review any holdings you might have in the following stocks: American Can, Interstate Water, National Gas Company, Northern Tissue Company. Due to uncertain market conditions, I advise you to sit tight on your American Can, hold your Water, and let go of your Gas. You may be interested to know that Northern Tissue touched a new bottom today, and millions were wiped clean! Thanks Dave, for lightening up my heart (with the above “stock report”) around these issues, during such wacky, wacky times! Music can lighten the load too, and this week we offer some fine musical choices to break up all this hub-bub. Whatever you do please “take stock” in creative arts, nature, friends, laughter and family…where a GOOD return is a safe bet for a better week! • Wednesday 10/22 Jay’s offers low volume, low volatility jazz…so get your nose, ear, and assets off the grindstone and into the Bistro and relax! Guitarist, Mike Davis is our featured guest with Roger Barnhart on bass, Mark Raynes on drums and Mark (me) Sloniker at the piano (7-10PM). As always, Thanks for Listening! Mark 10/08/08 WARNING: the following paragraph contains material shown on TV (all hours of the day) and may not be suitable for anyone with taste or discretion. Who’da thunk it! That those crafty folks at Viagra would use the financial bailout/rescue to promote their own product. I think that they’re really hitting below the belt with lines like: “We’ve got Thee MOST effective stimulus package for hard times!” or “We’re raising your interest rate for inflation you can count on!” This must be “short selling” at its worst! And of course the disclaimers at the end of the commercials are anything but a soft sell…”For a bull market lasting more that four fiscal quarters call your broker immediately!” or “Consult with your banker to see if you’re healthy enough for hard currency!” OR “if you have ever had liquidity problems or have an aversion to small bills (or a shrinking dollar), then this product may not be suitable for you.”….what is this world coming to anyway! We’re not going to go there…no way….. Music is just plain good for morale so stop on by and we’ll lift your spirits (and only your spirits): • Wednesday 10/08 Jay’s Bistro hosts Marty Kenny/bass, Mark Raynes/drums, Mark Sloniker/piano and special guest Ron Cottingham/guitar. Ron has a masterful touch and draws from guitar greats like Joe Pass, Kenny Burell and Wes Montgomery for a wonderful evening of fine tunes. (7-10) Jazz @ Jay’s is a capital idea! 10/01/08 The results are in (from the National Lexographer’s Word-Off Competition) and this year’s undisputed ONE-WORD-OXYMORON winner IS “monosyllabic”!!!! “Shed” (that “Jekyll and Hide” word, that as a noun means a place for storage BUT as a verb is the ultimate getting rid of) was a close second (no a distant second, no a close second)…while “citation” was both punished and praised for being exemplary AND heinous (all at the same time) that is, according to the letter of the law! Half of those judging the letter of the law were found to be inconsonant while the other half had an untimely vowel movement after having a spell (or would that be misspell) cast on them. Alphabetical disorder broke out and several Dis-Lexicographers were sent in to reverse the spell and sentence the guilty. After which the Nonsensical Poetry competition was cancelled…for no rhyme or reason. If I need a letter of recommendation I am going to pick U. If you join us for some music we will play everything only using only seven letters (or so). • Wednesday 10/01 Jay’s Bistro features Mary Buirgy starting the evening with us at 7pm for a couple of sets of fine vocals with Roger Barnhart/bass, Mark Raynes/drums and me on piano (music 7-10). October continues with featured guests/friends: Ron Cottingham/guitar on Wednesday 10/08. Kevin Whalen/trumpet Friday 10/10. Wendy Fopeano/voice Saturday 10/11. Bard Hoff/guitar Friday 10/17. Colleen Crosson/voice Saturday 10/18. Ryan Fourt/guitar & Erik Applegate/bass Friday 10/24. Billy Hundley Saturday 10/25. In the meantime, put in a good word for all those dedicated lexographers out there! Mark 09/25/08 We have just been authorized to bail you out! That’s right, the congress of cosmic muses, sirens, singing angels and symphonic spirits have officially authorized us wacky jazz musicians to bail-you-out-of-any duldrums, dread, dreariness or (dare I say it) depression you may be feeling. We will bail you out with C-notes and G-notes on a humongous Scale (this is no minor event) but a major step to put everyone on our Staff and end this Flat Accidental Movement with A-Sharp rise in volume distribution of billions of notes in your direction. And for every half step you take to work in harmony with us, you will be rewarded with 100 cents of register change (this last sentence is extremely funny if you are an expert in the field of Acoustics or you are a piano tuner). Remember, Volume distribution is our Forte! Everyone present will receive the same number of C-notes at the same bass rate and an open door policy at the Bistro will reverberate this offer right onto main street (well, at least onto Oak Street). I’ll begin this evening’s music with a Key-Note address and everyone will be making scale in no time (after all, the meter’s running – the bass is walking – and the drummer is rolling in the dough-ray-me). Let’s go for Baroque! I know you can Handel it…after all, there’s no Hayden from it! • Wednesday 9/24 Jazz Bistro Bail Out Begins (Bar none) 7-10 with Roger-Bailout-Barnhart on bass, Mark “Kick Back” Raynes/drums, Mark “C-Note” Sloniker/truncated-ivory-player and special guest Bard Hoff on EEleven (I mean volume guitar). We want to bail-you-out! Mark (Wacky Musician) Sloniker Mary Buirgy sings Wednesday (10/01) at 7pm and Saturday (10/04) at 8:30. Peter Sommer/sax Friday 10/03. Wendy Fopeano, Sat. 10/11. 09/17/08 HOWDY! What follows our music announcements came to us by way of Colleen’s dad (thanks Dave), who among other things is a cross word puzzle ace and wordsmith extraordinaire (to boot). This is one of my “fave” word-play-grounds and a fabulous bit o’ sharp wit (and we know the pen is mightier than the sword). But first, Live Music and more… • Wednesday Sept. 17th Jay’s Bistro hosts guest soloist/sax man Andrew Vogt, with Mark Raynes/drums, Marty Kenny/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano. Original compositions as well as jazz perennials will grow on you and fill the air. Please note we have moved our Wednesday jazz time up slightly to 7-10pm. Upcoming Bistro Dates: Friday 9/26 features guitarist Ryan Fort. Wednesday 10/1 features vocalist Mary Buirgy. 9/09/08 NEWSFLASH: Jazz performances of the last several weeks have been responsible for the recent cool-down in temperatures leaving some scientists to believe global warming could be contained using a remarkable “cool-jazz-for-cool-cats” strategy. This method has shown that when people listen to cool music (eg. jazz) THEY become cool and or cooler, thus reducing the overall planetary temperature by decreasing the little known, dreaded, Bozone level. This Bozone wipes out our ozone and gets people all riled up because it is primarily a bunch of hot air. Bozone can turn an otherwise sensible group of people into raving Bozonians who clown around trying to put a happy face on certain disaster. Your mission, is to partake of cool jazz and thus lower the overall Bozone layer and replacing it with cool-hip, cool cat demeanor. Why here are some cool-jazz-for-cool-cats opportunities right here… • Wednesday 9/10 (7-10PM) Jay’s Bistro is “chillin’” with the likes of Roger Barnhart/bass, Mark Raynes/drums, Ron Cottingham/guitar and Sloniker/keys this is a very cool band so FREEZE on over for an ice breaker! Stay Cool! Mark 8/27/08 All below at Jay’s Bistro except where indicated: Upcoming Bistro Jazz Features: Gene Libbea, Thurs. 9/4. Peter Sommer, Fri. 9/5. Mary Buirgy, Sat. 9/6. Kevin Whalen, Fri. 9/12. Colleen Crosson, Sat. 9/20. I’ll be at Dazzle in Denver with Ron Miles, Paul Romaine, Bijou Barbosa, and Joe Anderies on Thurs 9/18 (two shows 7 and 9). As always, Thanks for Listening! Mark 8/20/08 We’re celebrating the second Bistrolympics this week with Track and Lounge Events that will leave you hanging on the edge of your bar stool. Although any wavering or body checking there could cost you a tenth of a point if not complete disqualification from the lounge games altogether. Our 100 meter hurdling (as opposed to hurling) event involves jumping over the drums complete with drummer, and bass with bassist before vaulting the piano and piano player over the finish line. The winner gets the gold (Cuervo Gold) and a chance to “poll” vault into the VP spot at the Democratic National Convention next week in Denver. While track attire is recommended, pant suits are optional. The 12 bar dash involves the pianist, bassist and drummer running to 12 other bars (no rushing) playing a 12 bar blues in each establishment before absconding with 12 of their regulars and bringing them back to the bistro. Any straggling patrons could cost you up to five tenths of a point (plus half that patrons current bar tab). We’re trying to improve last year’s time of 59 minutes 26.4457 seconds and really raise the bar this year. The competition between our fine upstanding bistro lounge and that low down “Drunken Monkey” across the street will be called The Uneven Bars (event) and in the event of a tie, the bar with the most ties will win. Any Questions? Then let the games begin! • Wednesday 8/20 Jay’s (7:30-10:30) Olympiads include Marty Kenny/bass, Ron Cottingham/guitar, Mark Raynes/drums and Mary Lou Sloniker/piano and tumbling (always to a new level of lowness) May the best WoMan (a new politically correct, intergenderous term including, but not limited to, both genders) WIN! Mark P.S. I’ll be performing at Dazzle in Denver on Thursday September 18th (shows at 7 and 9) with Ron Miles/trumpet, Paul Romaine/drums, Joe Anderies/sax, and Bijoux Barbosa/bass for more info contact me or Dazzle. 8/13/08 Last Notice: CSU Lagoon Series Concert TONIGHT 6:30-8:30 (one block south of Laurel and Loomis) Hugh Ragin/trumpet, Erik Applegate/bass, Mark Raynes/drums and Mark Sloniker/piano. 8/08/08 # Wednesday August 13th at the CSU Lagoon (one block south of Laurel and Loomis on the CSU campus) 6:30-8:30 with Hugh Ragin/trumpet, Mark Raynes/drums, Erik Applegate/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano. This is a free concert in a beautiful and spacious setting (my favorite) with trees and grass and cloudless skies above. Bring a blanket or lawn chair(s) and relax and enjoy some music! For more information, go to “Summer Lagoon Concert Series at CSU” or “The Mantooth Company” on the internet. This is a great chance to catch trumpeter Hugh Ragin in a rare Fort Collins performance as we celebrate 24 years of playing together! Here’s the “repeat”: Here’s your chance to catch some priceless musical fun at Jay’s Bistro! As always, thanks for listening! Mark 8/05/08 1 tube of #30 sunblock sun tan lotion: $3.95 3 gallons of gas (for the drive from Manasquan to Red Bank): $12.00 1 drive down to the Board Walk Amusement Park: $14.00 A glass of wine at Jay’s: $6.50 Here’s your chance: 8/01/08 Dear jazz/music friends, This planet is currently offering several (out-of-this-world) sweet beboportunities to catch some delightfully “cool vibrations” (jazz-jargon for “lively music” – must be wearing a jaunty beret while using such jazz-speak-ease-lingo…or having a bitchin’ set o’ bongos with which to bombastically celebrate the “beat”!?). I know what busy cats you are, so I will cut to the chase-so-to-speak. Suffice it to say that I am blessed and fortunate to be a part of the following events with the following “Music Doctors” (hence to abbr. M.D.) so please, “Carpe these beboportunities” and song full loonities and pop on out for some toonage…soonage… (you know this universe as-we-know-it, has only got another 14 or 15 billion good years left in her - or not…rumor has it the extended warranty on the Milky Way Galaxy expired yesterday). These mysterious Music Doctors can bring a healing to how you feeling…Or whimsically ‘splain away your pain…Or bring a serene sane coolery to this heated global foolery. Whatever the spasm, the razzle dazz of jazz can ford THAT chasm. If you got a mope, don’t call the Pope for these jazz Drs. can ascend any slippery slope. So just dawn on your “cazh” summer finery…you be the grape…we’ll be the winery! (No pressing matters here!) Jay’s Bistro Gigs: Stay cool! And as always, thanks for listening! Mark 7/16/08 Thanks to so many of YOU who were able to attend our set at the Fort Collins Jazz Experience on Saturday! It was one of THEE best sets of jazz I have ever had the good fortune to partake in with band-cats and listener-cats alike (with improvisational music, everyone present is part of the co-creational process). AND, what a perfectly beautiful summer day in which to celebrate and cocreate jazz of many, many flavors, outdoors in thee-so-very-wonderful setting of Old Town, where music was going on, on three stages at once! Thank You, Thank You, Thank You for your ebullient presence in our ever evolving music! Some of the things I love about jazz are: it’s “extemporaneous” life-affirming willingness to be created in the moment (this is a willingness that requires courage and conviction, an ingredient greatly valued by such deep and innovative thinkers as Thomas Edison and George Washington Carver); it’s inclusivity and love of diversity and variety (like it’s birth place which has been called a “melting pot”…honoring the many paths that lead to the one!); and it’s exuberence and vigor in celebrating the joy of being alive (however tenuous it may appear to be from time to time!). Jazz (described by documentary film maker, Ken Burns, as “America’s” most significant artistic contribution to the world thus far) is singing to me in this very instant. And it’s song is saying that our current situation is not a doldrum nor a dilemma but an opportunity to respond to the moment in the moment with wisdom and convicton and strength and common sense and good humor and gregarity and humility which can unite ALL lovers of liberty and self determination and freedom ALL around the world. This is a time for these like minded hearts and souls to reach across aisles and borders and rivers and oceans with open hands, eager to paint a Bigger picture; a new picture that is even more life-affirming, planet-affirming and harmony-affirming….humanity- affirming than ever before! My wise and wonderful mamma always said that every challenge was an opportunity in disguise, beckoning us forward to grow. Let’s sieze this one and turn it UP-SIDE-DOWN….ready, on “hike-double-three”….and I will be painting with my eager hands and brushes (the piano) at these places and times…please join me when and where you can. • Wednesday 7/16 (7:30-10:30) Jay’s Bistro is the canvas for Marty Kenny/bass, Mark(s) Raynes and Sloniker and special guest Mathew Floyd/sax as they join hands in a finger painting of joyful sound (this gives digital music a whole new meaning)! The sound of two feet tapping – one hand clapping and no one rapping (at least any angry words). ALSO: Sunday, August 3rd, Colleen Crosson and I will be doing a concert in the very cool backyard of Avogadro’s Number (605 S. Mason St., Fort Collins) on the very cool “mini-Telluride-esque” stage in that aforementioned very cool backyard! We will be mixing it up with jazz, contemporary folk and original Sloniker “heartsongs” that perhaps few of you on this list have heard before! The concert starts at 7 pm (it’s a “work night” for some folks and we respect that), and admission is $10 at the door. Come out and “play” with us – it’s all ages, kid friendly with a tree house and everything! AND Wednesday, August 13, Mark Sloniker and Friends will be making some joyful jazz at the CSU Lagoon Concert Series (6:30-8:30). This is a wonderful location to sit on the grass surrounded by beautiful trees and enjoy some tunes. Bring a picnic and we will paint a sweet summer soundscape for your ears! Google “Lagoon Summer Concerts” for more information regarding this and other Lagoon Concerts this summer. As Always, Thanks for listening (it’s a joy and honor to play for you)! Mark 7/09/08 Such a great chance to experience a myriad of jazz this week, could be called a…BEBOPPORTUNITY! JAZZ @ Jay’s during the Fort Collins Jazz Experience starts NOW…well tonight: There’s something about Live Music, Summer Sun and Fun that makes this week a wonderful bebopportunity to enjoy our community, so we hope to see your smiling face somewhere along the way! As always, Thanks for Listening! Mark Q: What’s the difference between a large pizza and a jazz piano player? 7/04/08 One DVD of Studio Ghibli’s film “Spirited Away”… $29.95 Dr. Dan Gilbert (of Harvard) says that experiences are “better” than things because we will always have them. Right on Dr. Dan! Well, as experiences go, here’s another priceless one (for me, at least): One beer…$3.50 (approx.) Thanks (as always) for Listening, *The use of the word American here refers to the United States of America. PS Mark Sloniker & Friends will perform at the Fort Collins Jazz Experience on Saturday July 12 at 4:30PM on the Old Town Square Stage (and later that night at Jay’s Bistro. For more information please go to: http://www.downtownfortcollins.com 6/30/08 Dear E-Mail friends. This letter comes right from the top (hum "Hail To The Chief" wistfully while reading). m.s. My Fellow Americans.. I have in my possession, the ONLY patriotically-ethically-morally-spiritually-and intelligently proper and approved method for correctly spending your IRS Rebate Check. It is there below. Watch out! It is tricky! It can be dangerous! But I am convinced it is the only way to save America (when I say America, I hope you know that I am referring to the United States and NOT Mexico, Brazil, Canada, Argentina or any other of the other western hemisphere nations that in totality make up "the Americas," NOR am I addressing any of the citizens of those countries who, by definition ARE AMERICANS and DO have just as much right to refer to themselves as Americans as do we. I was just doing that all these years to see if you were paying attention! You are SO-NOT paying attention. By the way, Laura and I went out last weekend and tried the method explained below (we bought a composting bin from Tipper and Al). We’re making new American soil as we speak (not Brazilian nor Canadian nor Mexican soil, mind you -- this here New soil is American!) Yours TRULY! G.W.B. (you can stop humming now) How to use Your IRS Rebate check... As you may have heard, each of us will be getting a tax rebate check to stimulate the economy. If we spend that money at Wal-Mart, all the money will go to China. If we spend it on gasoline it will go to the Arabs. If we purchase a computer it will go to India. If we purchase fruits and vegetables it will go to Honduras and Guatemala. If we purchase a good car it will go to Japan. If we purchase useless stuff it will go to Taiwan and none of it will help the American economy. We need to keep that money here in America. The only way to keep that money here at home is to spend it at yard sales since those are the only businesses left owned by Americans!! ONE other very American place to spend your check is at establishments where jazz (the only real American Music) is played. You could buy micro-brews…that’s beer brewed by American-micro-brew-beer-brewers OR American Wine, made by American Whiners (there’s no shortage of them these days). Why there’s a Jazz Establishment (aka Jay’s Bistro) Now! • Tonight (Wed.) 6/23 (7:30) Monster Trux Jazz Trio with special guest Andrew Vogt/sax. Remember: Yard sales and Jazz AND God Bless America! Mark 6/18/08 There are some wonderful musicians appearing at Jay’s Bistro this week. I cordially invite you to catch some great music if you can and stop on by. UPCOMING: Wednesday 6/25 features Andrew Vogt/sax. Friday 6/27 features Ryan Fourt/guitar. Saturday 6/28 Marguerite Juenemann/voice. Come on down and check out some cool jazz at the Bistro! As always, Thanks for Listening! Mark 6/3/08 We caught Chick Corea, Stanley Clark, Lenny White and Al Demiola last night at the Paramount in Denver. What a wonderful concert and a bit of “a rite of passage” to share this band with my son, Myles. The first time I caught RTF (Return to Forever) was in the late 70s when I was living in Santa Barbara, CA…that was a different incarnation of RTF but fabulous as well. Next time I saw Chick was at the Hollywood Bowl ’79 with Herbie Hancock – two grand pianos two amazing jazz pianists (that was it) and a very different AND fabulous concert as well. Then I saw Chick again in the early 80s at Mackie Auditorium in Boulder with Gary Burton. Vibes and Piano Duo totally different from either of the other gigs JUST as brilliant just as amazing. Last night was my first Demiola, White, Clark and Corea concert and again what a wonderful and unique night of music. Chick has been one of my favorite pianists over the years (at one point 7 out of every 10 records [that’s right vinyl] I put on the player was one of his). So in the middle of the concert my son leans over to me and says “that lick he just played sounds like you and those chords do to and I can see that this guy has really influenced your playing dad. Wow these cats are amazing!” Concert tickets: $80 I’ll be playing some music (that sounds like I listened to a lot of Chick records over the years) with some amazing cats at the some cool spots real soon! • Wednesday (tonight) 6/4 Jay’s Bistro (7:30-10:30) with Mark Raynes/drums, Roger Barnhart/bass, Ron Cottingham/guitar, Mark Sloniker/piano and special guest, Justin Thyme/reeds. This band will groove and swing to your heart’s delight! Come on down and we will create a priceless moment (or two) of music and merriment! Upcoming: Friday 6/13 trumpeter, Kevin Whalen. Saturday 6/14 vocalist, Colleen Crosson. Thursday 6/19 violinist, James Anderson. Saturday 6/21 vocalist, Wendy Fopeano. 5/21/08 Okay, first jazz line-up…then bad puns. Unfortunately, do to some personnel and logistical dilemmas we have been forced to cancel the June 1st Concert at Jay’s Bistro. If you have already sent me a check for tickets, I will write “void” all over it and send it back to you. Sorry for the change of plans. We hope to reschedule at a later time. So, NO concert 6/1 but YES, live jazz this week at Jay’s Wednesday through Saturday! Thanks for Listening, Mark I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me. 5/16/08 Good news regarding our June 1st Sunday Afternoon at the Bistro Concert! Trumpeter Extraordinaire Hugh Ragin will be on the roster, along with The Monster Trux Trio (Mark Raynes/drums, Mark Sloniker/piano). I know the word trio means three, and that third is usually Erik Applegate/bass. It looks as though Erik has another engagement at that time, but is working on connecting us with one of his cohorts at the jazz studies program at UNC. In any event, I can promise you a very inspired set (two sets!) of fine listening jazz in an intimate and casual (and quiet/listening) environment. The music will be superb, and Hugh, because of his busy schedule, hasn’t been able to perform in the Fort for quite a while (so it’s especially exciting to be able to create some inspired toonage with him on this occasion. Tickets are on sale through me or through our concert-care-taker Philip Coggon philipcoggon@comcast.com (Philip has been “instrumental” in supporting this idea…Thanks Philip!). The cost is $15 and they are limited and already going out the door. You will need to make advanced reservations by e-mailing Philip or me, and then sending a check to either of us at the addresses below (You can also get them from me while we’re at the Bistro Wed. through Saturday Nights). There will be a cash bar (hopefully with some light munchies available). I hope you can join us for this new-fun-and-different way to catch some inspired jazz in the Fort! As always thanks for listening!
5/13/08 You know the difference between musicians and municipal bonds don’t you? Municipal bonds mature…and make money! Okay, Okay! Supposedly, the Muse were Zeus’ nine daughters whose job it was to inspire humans in the areas of art and science (and kick butt on the baseball diamond in their off hours and between their musings). It was art and science’s job to make people’s lives and governments more tolerable during their stay in this world. In-as-much: the Dahli Lama once said, “there is no need for complicated philosophies or fancy temples. Our own hearts are our temples; the philosophy is kindness. A few unfancy temples will be conjuring up the music (muse zic) of a simple philosophy (as best they can) at the following times and locations (strictly for your amusement): • Wednesday 5/14 Jay’s Bistro (7:30-10:30) (Thee Original) Monster Trux Trio (Erik Applegate/Mark Raynes/Mark Sloniker) with special guest Justin Thyme (not his real name) but you have seen him wrestle on TV under his wrestling name Giant Stepper. Justin will take on the entire trio (tag team style) in 12 rounds of “Row, Row, Row Your Boat” over the changes of “Maiden Voyage”…winner take all! Didn’t the Greeks invent Saturday afternoon TV wrestling? ALSO: A very special listening concert will be taking place at Jay’s Bistro on Sunday June 1st at 3pm. It will feature a special edition of the Monster Trux Trio and a very special out of this world (or at least out of town) guest!!! For tickets and/or more information please go to Philip Coggon at philipcoggon@hotmail.com. Thanks for listening! Mark 4/22/08 It was great to see so many of you out at the Taste last Thursday at the Hilton. I heard a “tasty” (as opposed to nasty) rumor that ticket sales approached 500 and that we may have raised $100,000 or more on the event (the numbers are still coming in from the silent auction etc.). Our friends at Neighbor to Neighbor and the Larimer County Food Bank (two such wonderful orgs.) were very happy with the turn out. This was Taste #13 for me and I think I may have hit over 49% of the right notes during our three and a half hour set of continuous tunes…with numbers like that, I could be the next president! Thanks to Colleen Crosson, Chuck Landgraf, Oscar DeZoto, Ron Cottingham, Roger Barnhart and Gene Libbea for giving their time and talent to this event. On to more tasty tunes for music munching and song savoring… T(h)anks! Mark 4/9/2008 The proper term for folks getting that gloomy mood when the darkness and cold of winter becomes too much, would be “seasonal depression”. The term that applies to this time of year when Colorado has a winter storm warning out and winter has been over (finito, done, “ciaos-ville”) for almost three weeks…but is making one, in a series of last ditch attempts at spoiling my spring…now the proper term for that is “Seasonal Exasperation”. I mean, enough already! Oh well, if we DO get the 8 inches of snow tonight, then snow-person building contests and hot toddies will be happening on the patio at the Bistro between sets. And during sets, we will play the hottest bloomin’ jazz that’ll make you think you’re in the tropics…bathing suits optional… • Wednesday 4/9 Jay’s Bistro features sweltering hot jazz (7:30-10:30) with Ron Cottingham/guitar, Marty Kenny/bass, Mark(s) Raynes and Sloniker drums and keys. Wear your oven mitts. Mark 4/2/2008 Spring time in Colorado has never been more fun. I have a song called “Reluctant Spring” (a friend commented that the title sounds like a tempramental deodorant soap)…but NO it’s just describing our spunky, moody flip-floppy, diverse spring weather that swing’s from warm glow to snow globe in ten minutes or were those seconds. Spring – like jazz can turn on a dime (to coin a phrase) but this is no time to be confined to quarters when we have the fresh cent of a jazz buck to track through the penny pasta point of no refund. It’s good that change is good! • Wednesday 4/2 (7:30-10:30) Jay’s features the jazz of The Monster Trux Trio (Raynes/drums, Barnhart/bass & Sloniker/piano) with special guest Jim Franzen/sax. You’ll get a charge out of what’s coming up: Wednesday 4/9 features Kevin Whalen/trumpet. Friday 4/11 features Ryan Fourt/guitar. Saturday 4/12 feartures Colleen Crosson/voice. Friday 4/18 features Andrew Vogt/sax. Saturday 4/19 features Mary Buirgy/voice. What a fair fare! Mark (Henny Penny) Sloniker….’better catch some jazz before the sky “you know whats”… 3/27/2008 Okay, we have some fine spring jazz for your listening pleasure at Jay’s Bistro. In honor of spring, all horn players must play their horns with tulips. The stand-up bass player rose to this occasion and the guitarist is no pansy either. We won’t pedal any of the cheap stuff or soil anyone’s reputation. This is jazz you can dig on without digging up any dirt on anyone or my name is mud. And, even though Chris wrote a lovely anthem, we think it our duty to keep Chris’- Anthem-Mum until we get to the root of the…and if these puns don’t seem to be growing on you, then weed rather not be pulling anything on you, stringing you along or asking you how you’ve bean. Lettuce rejoice more-over in the knowing that fertilizer is our friend, and if we want to get the full poop on the situation, then it is not a waste of time to bury the hatchet and cease any further cutting remarks. After all, this could stem into something… • Thursday 3/27 Jay’s Bisto brings you the fine guitar-man-ship of Mike Davis with Mark Sloniker/piano 7:30-10pm Coloado’s fickle spring weather can get rough so if you need me, I’ll be garden the flowers! Mark 3/21/2008 “Hear’s” a quit heads up for some cool jazz this week end and BEYOND… Next Week…Ron Cottingham joins up with the Monster Trux Trio, Wednesday 3/26. Mike Davis, Mark Sloniker Duo do a Duover by popular demand on Thursday 3/27. Kevin Whalen/trumpet joins Mark Sloniker Trio for fun on Friday 3/28. Wendy Fopeano joins Sloniker and Friends for fun and far out fugal frolicking on Saturday 3/29. Happy Spring! Mark 3/6/2008 Well, Daylight Savings looks to yield a light gain as we close out this first quarter. Although all gains will appear late in the day and the House of The Rising Sun will be left in the black, as if foreclosed upon by that darkest of darkness, occurring just before the dawn (which will be an hour late if you haven’t gotten my making light of the time change by now)…well then set your watches with this. If you want my two cents about time “change”…they got the spin all wrong on daylight savings. Just as we are gradually seeing a modest net gain in the early returns (to hell with the bulls and the bears…the roosters are UP!), they (being the time change charlatans), like a maniacal Machiavellian mob of mortgage mad meanies, take from the poor early morning risers and give to the rich, warm, late afternoon ne’er-do-well fair weather friends, already basking in solar inside trading. In other words, IT’S THE MORNING WHEN WE NEED THE LIGHT (calm down Mark). The afternoon is already seeing brighter futures. Ever since “daylight savings” was invented in 3,692 B.C. by Ray Lender, the planet’s been on “tilt”. Ray, who also invented the Electoral College, the Dictatorial grammar school AND the Gubernatorial State of Disrepair, is rumored to have helped design human knees, the tax system, and health care. I say we sell daylight savings even if it puts us in the red…let’s let Mother Nature take back what was hers all along – after all, where daylight is concerned – well the sky’s the limit and a new bright idea may be just beyond the horizon! Jazz will make light of everything in the following times and places: • Thursday 3/6 Jay’s Bistro (7-10:30) Ron Cottingham/guitar and Mark Sloniker/piano trip the (day) light fantastic with a (sun) set of jazz Just like the sun, the music above will be a series of beautiful sets! Ciao, Mark 2/14/2008 Well this week, I have heard from so many of you in regard to lefties and righties etc. I hope I can do justice to all the e-mails sent my way - I may need a hand. This latest piece of info certainly took me by surprise. In the 2002 election, Ross Perot, George Bush Sr. and Bill Clinton were (and I guess still are) all lefties. Many e-mails informed me that “you” throw with your left but bat with your right or write with your right but golf left handed or cut right handed but paste left handed. My bass player friend “Marty” questioned what left or right handed guitar playing was anyhow because it’s the other hand that is really doing the more complex job! Piano playing is similar in nature. In the end, I guess I got to hand it to you – we are rightly left with a handsome mixture of duo dominant dexterities, delivering us from divisive dualities into the delightful domain of diversity. When the right hand knows (and appreciates) what the left hand is doing we become undefeatable. But let’s save de-feet for next week when more, I’m sure will be handed down to us. • Wednesday 2/13 Jay’s Bistro (7:30-10:30) features Monster Trux Trio (Raynes, Barnhart & Sloniker) with special guest Mary Buirgy/voice. Upcoming…James Anderson/violin Friday 2/22. Mary Buirgy/voice Saturday 2/23. Peter Sommer/sax Friday 2/29 Either way, I hope a Great Week is on hand for you! Mark 2/6/2008 I noticed the other day at a televised debate that Barack Obama is a south paw. Likewise, at another presidential debate, John McCain was writing “south paw” as well. What an interesting situation it would be if two lefties were squaring off for the “highest office in the land”. As a lefty myself, I notice these things. Other lefties catch it too! After all we’ve suffered through…like no left handed butter knives or mustache cups…only righty scissors in kindergarten…the word for left in Latin is “sinister” and in French it’s “gauche” (and I have probably misspelled that word because of my “other” brain dominance). How gauche can I get! Well fellow lefties: we’ve come a long way from sinister or gauche or being fed to the wolves or forced in schools to become righties…and just as soon as we take the oval office, we’re forcing everyone to be lefties…well for at least an hour or two…just so they can see what it feels like. Then, just as soon as we’ve lost all our rights, we’ll demand our rights back because in reality, right handed or left handed - neither’s bad! It’s those under handed people we need to reckon with. No playing softball with them! Just remember – vote left! After all, two wrongs don’t make a right, but three lefts do! (think about it)! Wednesday 2/6 Jay’s Bistro (7:30-10:30) Marty Kenney/left bass…and forward march, Mark Raynes/great drums – hands down, Mark Sloniker (99% of all piano players are both handed) and special guest (what does he mean by “special”) sax man, Andrew Vogt! • Thursday 2/7 Jay’s Bistro (7-10:30) Ron Cottingham/handy on guitar and Mark Sloniker (unhand that man) on piano. Come down! You’ll be in good hands, we promise! Mark (Hans Christian Anderson) Sloniker Coming soon: Kevin Whalen/trumpet Friday 2/15. Colleen Crosson/voice Saturday 2/16. James Anderson/violin Friday 2/22. Mary Buirgy Saturday 2/23. Peter Sommer/sax 2/29. 1/30/2008 Dear E-Friends – Since I inadvertently sent this out on Colleen’s e-mail the first time, I didn’t want there to be any confusion, so I’m sending it again, from me! Sorry for duplicates! I DID NOT write this one (“Some Sad News”). But I wish I had…it was forwarded to me by Dave. Thanks Dave, this is really sweet, and I certainly got a RISE out of it! Some Sad News • Wednesday (tonight) 1/30 Jay’s Bistro hosts our very own Monster Trux Trio (Mark Raynes, Marty Kenney & Sloniker) with special guest, guitar guru Bard Hoff. I moved to Fort Collins 20 plus years ago to join a band with Bard and we toured all over the U.S. and Canada and played some cool venues like opening for Bob James at Red Rocks and Pat Metheny at Toronto Jazz Festival. It was quite a hoot! Join us if you can (7:30-10:30). In honor of Ground Hog Day we will play “The Shadow of Your Smile”. Other February Dates Include: Andrew Vogt/sax on Wednesday, 2/6. Ryan Fourt/guitar on Friday, 2/8. Mary Buirgy/voice on Wednesday, 2/13. Kevin Whalen/trumpet on Friday 2/15. Colleen Crosson/voice on Saturday 2/16. James Anderson/violin on Friday, 2/22. As always, Thanks for Listening! mark 1/15/2008 Did you hear the one about this guy who is late for the most important meeting of his life and he’s circling the block of the building that the meeting is to take place in and it’s morning rush hour traffic in down town New York City. The guy’s whole career and future is riding on this meeting and he has just two minutes to park his car and get in there or the whole thing will go down the tubes. So he yell’s out “Dear God if you get me a parking place I swear to you, that I will lead my life from this day forward truly devoted to you! I will always be honest and generous to the poor and kind to every soul I meet and donate huge amounts to charities and never cheat…” And right then as he rounds the corner, miraculously, some one pulls out of a spot right in front of him, right by the doors he needs to go into to make his meeting and secure his future. He pulls into the parking place and yells, “Never mind. I found one!” If you were looking for some really fine jazz as if your whole life depended on it….you might try looking here; • Wednesday 1/16 (7:30-10:30) Jay’s Bistro - The first set is Monster Trux Trio with Mark Raynes/drums, Roger Barnhart/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano. The second set features sax-maniac, Andrew Vogt. We will, we will rock You! Wednesday nights are generally less crowded than Fridays and Saturdays, and a great time to celebrate that mid-week Miles marker. And now back to our regularly scheduled program; • Friday 1/18 (8:30-11:30) Trumpet troubadour (and current director of the Greeley UNC Jazz Festival), Kevin Whalen will join Erik Applegate/bass, Mark Raynes/drums and Mark Sloniker /piano. We will feature trumpet tributes to Miles Davis, Lee Morgan, Louis Armstrong and Clifford Brown. As far as parking places go: you’re on your own…or are you? Thanks for Listening! Mark 1/8/2008 It must be an election year because two of my favorite primary colors are being given assigned seating on a map looking strangely like US. Happy New Year by the way, and I don’t want to hit you with any off-color humor too soon (oh heck, why not - it’s already January 8th…this year’s practically shot), but I couldn’t help think…How did the republican party get the color red and how did the democratic party get the color blue and do other parties have their own primary colors too?! Did these parties choose their color or were they assigned or prearranged to have these colors somewhere in the preamble to the constitution? Or perhaps this is a gray area…or worse yet, perhaps it was a plot by the media to try and get republicans to look “communist” or even worse, “sunburned” and the democrats to look “sad” (eg “the blues”) or even worse “true”. Next, do the “two parties” possess these colors in perpetuity (you didn’t think I knew that word did you?), or do they pay an annual tax, say, to the Crayola (sounds like “payola”) Corporation? Unless of course these colors have their headquarters outside of the red/blue map area and can therefore give those taxes the “brush-off”. If a color gets caught bending the light can it get a prism sentence? Are either of these colors affected by other colors (say green for instance), that could make things a bit more colorful (if you want to hear the black and the white of it…)? I’m thinking of starting a new party that would require two colors – black and blue – and we would decide everything via mosh-pit dancing. And I think we would have a huge impact on the country and each other. When you make an impression on someone in a mosh-pit…it’s a lasting one…until then, why not catch some tunes that are red hot AND true blue…why not…?? • Wednesday 1/9 Jay’s Bistro - Our young bass friend from Alaska (via UNC), Marty Kenney, joins Mark Raynes (Montana) on drums, Ron Cottingham (Colorado) on guitar and Mark Sloniker (planet Zolton) on piano (7:30-10:30). This is monster trux mania in its most colorful configuration. Upcoming gigs feature: Andrew Vogt Wed. 1/16. Kevin Whalen Fri. 1/18. Colleen Crosson Sat. 1/19. Grant Gordy Fri. 1/25 See ya there! Mark 1/3/08 I just learned on “Star Date” that we are actually closer (by millions of miles) to the sun this time of year than during the summer season. Proximity does not give us warmth…it is rather, having a good angle on things that provides us with these seasons which add color and in the case of winter, character to our global giddy-up! Did the sun get a touch overzealous in her plucky playfulness of planetary pinball; that “tilt” causing our current tilt, hence causing - VOILA’! – four fabulous seasons?? Perhaps my summer-ization is too simple for you to fall for…I’ll spring it on you later)!!! But seriously… A good spin on things seems to be the rule these days, and what a good thing and marvelous coincidence that the earth spins one good and full turn every twenty four hours (how amazing is that!). If the earth wasn’t the good spin doctor that she is, we might be left in the dark, or even worse - stuck permanently in the day, with the sun making light of us 24-7 (except that there would be no “twenty-four-seven” to experience 24-7 in) AND Cole Porter couldn’t or wouldn’t have written his famous song, unless he was traveling twenty fo- oops I mean traveling ad infinitum on Concord Jets (which don’t even fly anymore) ‘round an un-tilted un-spinning planet…can you say bbbbooorrrrrrriiiiinnnnnnggggggggggg! The longer the night, the better the jazz. So you better grab some now ‘cause things seem to be getting lighter every day (and night)…. • Tonight, Thursday 1/3 Jay’s Bistro features music in the darker keys (a minor improvement) with Forest Greenough/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano (7-10:30) Thanks for Listening, Mark |
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